CMM LEVEL WHAT ....SIX SIGMA MY _ _ _

You can fill in the last word with what came to your mind ...... GOD !! That is what you are thinking ? If no then continue reading.

I have been planning to write this post for while now but reading a related article in Economic Times was the immediate reason for doing so. Some guy from a consulting company was talking about the way appraisals were done - using a systematic and tiered (will not blame you if you confuse it for 'tired') approach. Even I was suffering from similar notions until sometime back; Until the time I was disabused of any such thoughts that I may have harboured. My Manager gave his best when it came to proving the adage "an employee does not leave his company, he leaves his manager".

Now to come to the certifications of SIX SIGMA and CMM LEVEL X; Indian IT companies bend over backwards to get these certifications - they automate everything calling it "compliance to achieve process streamlining". To that extent each company worth its salt does have computer applications right from joining to leaving the company and everything in between.
My ex-company lead the pack by integrating all possible employee-employer interaction in a single tool.

But there is a major caveat to this, I dare say, mindless automation. Irrespective of the process, the final word is that of the 'manager'. Your case is put forward by your manager. You may work your ass off but nobody can save you from the wrath of bell curve; nobody can help your cause if you were candid during meetings.

It has been felt by many IT employees that Indian Enterprise companies are fast turning into the babudoms the government was accused of becoming, not too long back.

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The realm of Management and the perceptions surrounding it

Management is an oft abused word. And if I am not wrong, this has been the case ever since the term was coined or ,may be, even before that. I have heard a gamut of opinions relating to management - starting from "It is a necessary eveil" to "Study Philosophy instead of Management". I have to accept, and this is an outsider's view, that managers have not really made any discernible effort to dispel any negative opinions about their utility. Important is to understand here is that when I say MANAGER, I mean the ones with the MBAs. Not to say that the ones who develop their managerial skills are any less, on the contrary, they are the ones who exhibit the indispensible characteristics of empathy, discretion, and decisiveness - the very things that I find missing in the made to order MBAs.

It has been often cited that MBA courses turn a student into a polished glib talker who can take a few good decisions too but they do not inculcate the sense of risk-taking, decision making and other "humane" skills needed to succeed in the business of life. In fact, they make it all the more difficult for a person to try and inculcate the above cited characteristics outside and after the MBA course.

This problem of disconnect manifests itself in many ways - lack of respect towards EXPERIENCE because of the misconception that an MBA is an elixir for all management problems; the missing passion towards one's job replaced by the objective manner in which one treat's one's job.

I, myself, am at a crossroad: whether to go for management education or not, when do I join an MBA course, which subjects should I select !!

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Hindi transliteration of Krishnaz song

Get the song here

मिटटी की खुशबु में
बूंदों की महक में
हर एक मुस्कान में
हर एक आवाज़ में
और हर दिल कि धड़कन में
मिटटी की खुशबु में
बूंदों की महक में
मुस्कान में
आवाज़ में
हर साज़ में हर जान में
रक्त कहो , लहू कहो, चाहे कहो ख़ून
मिटटी के रंग में जब रंगे तब मिले सुकून
बाजुओं में है इमान और मेह्नेत के औज़ार
भर्लो भर्लो आज दिलों में हिंद का जूनून
हिंद का जूनून
है एक सच
नहीं ये भ्रम
जुबां पे रहे
बस वंदे मातरम
रगों में बहता है
नस में उतरता है
जड़ों में, पदों में
पदों कि शाखों में
खेत खलियानों में
मचलती नदियों में
वंदे मातरम
वंदे मातरम
वंदे मातरम

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A patient dies in an ambulance caught in a traffic jam

No! Do not be aghast; you have reached a conlusion too fast. I am just trying to conjure a scenario which I am sure is very likely to happen at some point of time in our cities, that is of course, if something like this has not already happened. I was coming to office today and believe me I was caught in one of the worst traffic jams I have witnessed in Hyderabad in a long time. I could hear an ambulance waliling in the background, which translates into "There is an emergency here, please get your vehicles off the road". Well, I really did not see any change in the pattern of traffic. Either the siren was a regular there or the people had turned deaf from the incesssant honking which is so much a characteristic of Indian drivers, Hyderabadi drivers being one of the worst.

I could think of a few reasons why there was no discernible reaction to the siren.

Lack of training among the drivers.
Believe me, it is only later on in life that I realized why is a driving license , acquired by proper means, important. Driving is just not about moving a vehicle from one place to another, dodging other moving metallic pieces at high speed. It is about sensitizing a driver about the rules of traffic. Why are hazard lights important, what precautions to take when on wet roads, not to mention what should you do if you hear/see an ambulance jostling for a way forward. People are just to enamoured with instant gratification."I know how to drive, why should I go to an RTO and get a license by standing in a queue. Middlemen will do it for me". This apathy and ignorance, not just on part of the license holders but also on part of the government and concerned departments is costing many people their lives.

Lack of training among the traffic policemen
Sometimes, I suspect that the only training these police personnel especially among the junior ranks like constable et al, receive, is to salute any V I P car passing their way. They just galvanize into action the moment a siren of the different kind fills the air that of an IAS officer or that of a politician. At other times they just go through the motions of waving their hands. This is not to take away from them the stellar and definitely unenviable job of manning traffic islands which are civilised fuming chambers. But I am sure these guys need to be strict and innovative on their job.

Scandinavian countries have been truly professional when it comes to the quality of road services that they provide. Like a company is responsible for its products any damage that its products may cause, even Scandinavian countries are assuming responsibilty for the accidents occuring on their roads. They are targetting ZERO deaths on their roads. I think Indian governments, at the centre and at the state should similarly hold itself responsible for any loss of life and/or opportunity that results from its failure to provide its citizens with adequate if not excellent infrstructure.

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Return to the Past (5th August 07)

Today, I visited my alma mater after a gap of close to 2 1/2 years - 3 years to exaggerate a bit. Four years, four and a half taking my supplementaries into consideration, of my youth were spent in the campus of Cochin University of Science and Technology. Even while looking back at my experiences during those eventful years, I suddenly realize the waning strength of my relations which started in college.

An unknown State, an unknown language, people to whom I was an outsider and who themselves were inscrutable/unpredictable for me ! All these pleasantly conspired and enriched my journey manifold. Each and every place in the campus has a story associated with 'US'. The midnight bumps we gave to the birthday boys in front of the mosque; girls walking down from the SBI ATM towards Da Beach; Cherian, invariably, relieving himself in front of the Da Beach, notwithstanding the availability of resources inside our shelter. Arun being given a carte blanche to all the girls' hostels - he says it is because of his technical prowess and to an extent his oozing sexuality, we prefer believing that the girls' were convinced of Arun's benignity. The buffets at Saj, Harbour View, Silver Plates, Surya, Avenue Reagent, Renaissance. Murali Cheta's calm composed face made me think - "Looks like this man has made peace with everyone he needed to make peace with". ICH and their indifferent waiters; their cutlets which seemed to belong more to the past than to our stomach, "Chood Velum", the invincible combo of "Chor-Mor-Sambhar", the "Panjara Kall" - the stone benches where couples would sit and discuss metaphysical concepts of monumental ramifications. But as Cherian explained it well, it was just an ephemeral bout of intellect which acted as a fig leaf in front of a passerby - an alibi for the Close Encounters of the Freudian kind that they indulged in. Working out the technical and financial modalities for the ASIANET internet; Beach was the headquarters for all things holy, sinister, permissible interactions with the (not so) fairer sex.

Arun, Cherian and I walking from the Beach to Annexe. Cherian standing at the ICH X road and clapping his hand and in the process, scaring the shit out of the sleeping birds, LITERALLY. What followed was a flurry of activity of the volucrine kind and a road carpet bombed with bird poop.

Well, I can sure be accused of being selective/amnesic/narrowed in my nostalgia; but what can I do..the canvas called college life is just too vast to be painted by a single person. Also as concurred by many friends, this phase of life had its lessons too. But more on that in some later blog.

Most of the people from college whom I talk to, agree with the fact that college was a golden period of their lives. Everytime I look back on that phase, I feel a part of me saying "what if we could "TURN BACK THE CLOCK" The voice of this part of myself is fading each passing day. I think it is because of the simple realisation that such a temporal travel is not possible. College was COLLEGE because of ite people. Now, all the people have moved on or are trying to move on. People who have not been able to cross the threshold find no reason, at present, to savour the college days. For many of them it may actually be a s nightmare that will pass, give time.

I remember Sunil Sam, one of our batchmates. For him college life was an ordeal for the first half of the four years. Then, as luck would have had it, he met us. Suddenly college appeared to be dream, he wished, would last forever.

Cherian, my classmate, not to mention my close pal too; he had a very objective view of college life. "Enjoy it while I am here but I do not want to stay back in this mess" (to put it mildly).

For some like a few student party workers, the admission to this course was just a wild card entry into the murky world of student politics.

Nevertheless, a sizable number of us, were young a lot naive. The ones who had seen the world, "been there, done that" types; well college for them was just one of the motions of life to be gone through.

For Joe Bloggs' (to borrow the Princeton Review analogy) like me, college was a roller coaster of emotions, academics, assignments, frienships, skulduggery. Joe Bloggs' like me passed out, thanking God for the great experience, thirsting for more and well equipped to handle the intentional and unintentional vicissitudes of life.

Sometimes I feel, if I had realized that college would be so full of possibilities, which would not be afforded so easily later on, would I have done something different. If i had known that studying and getting marks, by any means possible, would have ensured more Zeroes in my pay packet, would I have handled the academics more seriously.

I will never know and to be sure, this is how I would like it to be. Waiting for my next visit to my alma mater for the next gush of nostalgic emotions which I am sure will result in another cathartic piece like this one.

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